Monday, October 06, 2008

All Kinds of Crazy

Hola Kids,

I don't know about you, but I'd like to think wiling away the time with some fruitless goss is a helluva lot more beneficial to the spirit than sitting around sniffling over the dismal state of our 401k's. Here goes:

Locklear Lockdown
Heather Locklear was dragged into the hoosgau last week after a "concerned citizen" saw her run her car back and forth over a pair of sunglasses and stumble into oncoming traffic. Of course, she tested positive for being under the influence of a controlled substance. It's official! She's come undone people!
I'm sure the very thought of this photo making its way 'round the interweb has this poor troubled lass wretching over the toi-toi...
That poor lil' Ava Sambora must be soooo over her parents self-destructive antics. Wonder if she'll turn around and become a civil defense attorney?

TV for the TiVo Impaired

Pro-jhay Runway
The fashion week showdown begineth. That sassy sister Jerrell may very well cease conversation with inanimate gourds long enough drape and pleat his way to greatness. I was all about Korto until I saw that sad piece of salmon lace sashay down the runway last week. Mealy-mouthed Leanne does possess a modicum of talent. But do we really care? Raise your hand if you're just tuning in to watch Kenley self destruct! Can't you hear her whiny voice now? "But I designed all these clothes and they DON'T look stupid!" Whatever. Betty Page called and you ain't answering.

AbFab Hell-ay Style?
Check out this report from Variety:

Edina and Patsy are ready to take on L.A. Fox is developing a redo of Jennifer Saunders’ enduring Britcom “Absolutely Fabulous. The latest attempt at a U.S. rendition of “Ab Fab” will be transplanted to L.A. but retain the basic template of the original, revolving around the friendship of two boozy, over-40 best friends who are desperate to stay hip and youthful and who carry on under the disapproving eye of Edina’s teenage daughter, Saffy.

This is either going to be amazingly relevent or make me burst into tears of grief, although with Saunders attached, I can't see her letting this become a piece of total shit. The price must've been right to haul her ass across the pond, that's for dang sure.

The Great Schlep
I'm sure this has crossed your desk by now but if not, please take a moment to bask in the genius that is Sarah Silverman as she ignites a movement to get our Floridian foreparents to vote Obama!

Fey Takes Palin
Again, I'm sure you've caught this latest installment but if not, take a gander and laugh your ass off.

Sarah Palin to do Tina Fey on SNL?
This would be a wise move on her part because amongst show-biz liberals and....anyone who reads really, Sarah Palin is a wretched, itchy pox that we must vaccinate the world against. She still will be, but at least it'll show all us Hockey Moms and Joe Six-Packs she has a sense of humor, *wink.*

Celebrity Sighting of the Week
Our Chelsea correspondent Sir Sleeque saw Anderson Cooper & Sandra Bernhard emerge from the same yoga class, mats in hand. I'm sure I'm not the only one reading this blog who'd appreciate the view behind Anderson's downward dog!

Fault Lines
A few Fridays ago, Brad and I made our way into the Village to see our friend Dominic rock in Fault Lines, a hilarious new play by Stephen Belber at the Cherry Lane Theater. Completely quotable and utterly enjoyable, it also stars Josh Lucas, Noah Emmerich and Jennifer Mudge. There are performances through November 2, so click and buy tix!

'Til next we meet, your faithful,



Mr. Pink said...

Heather Locklear. Love her. Will always love her and she can do no wrong. The "concern citizen" is about to get her ass sued for harrassment. The 911 operator told her 3 times to stop following Heather and let the police handle it but she didn't listen. Could the CC be none other than...

"My name is Jill," she told the operator.

Jill Ishkanian - a former Us Weekly employee turned paparazzo, who is reportedly under FBI investigation for hacking into Us Weekly's computer system to locate celebrities.


OMG. Have you seen the new OMG?

Yahoo's attempt at TMZ (of AOL).


Keep writing hon. Love your goss.

Momma Comma said...

Heather is fabulous - even looking like that miserable hot mess in that unfortunate footage.

Sure - Jill may have been out to get her. But what about the positive test for "controlled substances?"


She was still driving high as a kite.