Monday, June 16, 2008

Be Gay Today!

Heidi Ho, Cats and Kittens!

What up? Summer is here and it's time to drop trou, sun your buns and grab your share of scrumptious illicit goss...

Sex And The City: The Chick Flick
I finally managed to check my ass into a movie theater to take a gander at this SJP fueled spectacle, and a spectacle of high fashion and romanticism it truly was. If you want to see it but haven't, skip to the next topic. If my referring to these characters as real people also annoys you, well...too fucking bad. It's just easier.

Carrie and Miranda are both heartbroken as they see their relationships dissolve, but what irked me was that Carrie's drama seemed WAY bigger than Miranda's separation, and Miranda was relegated to coddling Carrie -- with a KID to boot. Whatever happened to give and take? If you ask me, that's enough to ease up on her for unwittingly fucking up the Carrie/Big wedding.

Why does Charlotte trot so fucking much? Did Estelle Getty inhabit her body?

Samantha + LA = the hoochiest wardrobe I ever done seen.

Kudos to the supporting actresses for starving themselves long enough to look nice and svelte next to the bookmark that is SJP. Utterly talented, ridiculously thin.

All in all, it was completely predictable but a lot of fun. If you aren't a HUGE fan, I'd save your stimulus money and order it on PPV.

TV for the TiVo Impaired

Top Chef
Stephanie won Top Chef! Woot! After Antonia got voted off, I was rooting for the even keel Steph to spill boiling hot pomegranate compote all over the obnoxious, Thai wanna-be Lisa.

Last night's anxiously awaited premiere didn't disappoint. Nancy and fam hit the road to land at Bubbie's, Judah and Andy's grandma's near the Mexican border, and unwittingly come up against her caregiver father Botwin, played shrewdly by Albert Brooks. Meanwhile back at the ginormous bonfire that is Agrestic, Celia's karma deals in spades as she takes the fall for Nancy's grow house and everyone, especially her daughter, throws her under the bus.

The Secret Diary of a Call Girl
Nicely shot scenes of London and Billie Piper's nubile body. Watch if you are male, heterosexual, bored and horny.

And now for the lowest of the lowbrow...
Denise Richards - It's Complicated
She wants a new image as talent and mother, but wonders aloud how to say no to Playboy as she takes off all her clothes to get a spray tan on television. What's a girl to do?
It's not complicated. She's just that stupid.

Here Come The Brides and Grooms!
Gay nuptualities are in full force today in California! Woot!

In honor of Pride, I thought you all might enjoy this endorsement of homosexuality...

Be Gay Today!

Aunt Dot Comes to Town
Dottie (aka Carlotta) has been one of my very favorite peeps for over 20 years, when we bonded over a flask of peach schnapps in the ladies room at Parsons.

We've been up to no good ever since.

She came to town with her gorge charge Emily, one of her fashion design students, who was receiving a distinctive award at Carnegie Hall.

Can you believe this woman has FOUR children?

Please note how Dylan is trained to jump right in.

Celebrity Sightings of the Week

Dottie traipsed around town after hours, as a woman with four kids is obliged to do when she's left them all on the opposite coast and no one is tugging at her for juice. She went to Double Happiness, where she happened upon the obnoxious "punk rock" Lauren from the last season of America's Next Top Model...she was tempted to trip her and bring her down like a tree but decided it wasn't worth the bother...

As most urbanites, we haven't a grill to our name, so I drove Brad and the kiddies down 8th Avenue in Chelsea to take him to RUB for some righteous BBQ for Father's Day. My darling husband announces he sees Mario Cantone on the sidewalk. Much to the dismay of the drivers behind me, I slow to a crawl to see my Beantown Boi strut his stuff and pop bubble gum like the fiercest bitch on any runway. As any Hag whose paid to see his Broadway revue would, I started screaming, "Mario! I love you!" but alas, it's probably a good thing the windows of my CR-V contained my adoration.

Got any sightings? Call my cell or shoot me an e!!

Mad Pimpin'

Check out my latest feature on about Sensory Processing Disorder...

Also, flip to the last page in this month's Parenting for my 10 Reasons to Rejoice NOT Being a Celebrity Mom!

Luf you all to pieces...


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