Tuesday, January 16, 2007

My Globes Are Bigger

Hey Kiddies,

Hope you had a great long weekend!

Orbs A Plenty

The opulent Golden Globes were last night, and as usual it seemed the spot for entertainers to get drunk, drunker and drunkest.

Happily, it was also the night for TALENTED women to take home the prize for once ...starting with Dreamgirl Jennifer Hudson.

How You Like Her Now?

Now, I don't mean to be all I told you so, but anyone who knew me during her season of American Idol can vouch for the fact that I had her nailed as a winner and was sorely disappointed at her early departure. Kenny and I were PISSED. But who has the last laugh now?

Another one of my faves, Ugly Betty's America Ferrara, took home Best Actress in a Comedy and her touching acceptance speech
almost had me dripping tears into my wine. Almost.

Here's a breakdown of last night's hookers and lookers:

J. Hud - Pure majesty.

America Ferrara - Proof that real girls clean up real good.
Jessica Biel - Beauty AND booty.
Eva Longoria - Verdi, very nice.
Renee Zellweger - Dress 10, face 3.
Emily Blunt - HAWT dress.

Sienna Miller - Dear GAWD, what was with that rat nest on her head?
Cameron Diaz - No wonder Justin woke up on the wrong side of that bed. She should know better than to take magic markers to her hair. EW.
Renee Zel
lweger - Even in the most gorgeous couture, she always manages to look like she's got throw up in her mouth.
Jennifer Love Hewitt - This attempt at Ophelia should've drowned.

Sasha Baron Cohen's tribute to his co-star's testicles was deep. Brad Pitt looked like shit and Angelina looked flawless. You could practically see the tube from his vein to her mouth. Warren Beatty was feeling no pain. Tom Hanks' hairline is about to crawl right off his head.

Queen of the Night: Dreamgirls director Bill Condon

Last but not least, I'm convinced all last nights makeup artists were on one long ciggie break because the greasy shine covering almost everyone's face last night caused a serious glare when it hit the stage lighting. It was like looking right into the sun.

Even The Body Can Have Issues With The Face

Check out Heidi Klum with no makeup...


Finally A Bride

Alan Cumming made it official with boyfriend Grant Shaffer last weekend.

Congrats cuties!

Hag of the Week

J. Hud
Worshipped by gays far and wide, she came out to clear her name last week after some comments were construed as anti-gay. Rings true to me and thus, I dub her Hag of the Week.

"I have said again and again that it was the gay community that supported me long before and long after AMERICAN IDOL, and kept me working and motivated. It is the gay community that celebrated my voice and my size and my personality long before DREAMGIRLS. Yes, I was raised Baptist. Yes, I was taught that the Bible has certain views on homosexuality. The Bible also teaches us not to judge. It teaches us to love one another as God loves us all. I love my sister, my two best friends and my director dearly. They happen to be gay."

That's it for now y'all. Have a great week!



toby said...

Alan Cumming + Grant Shaffer = PERFECT AND SO CUTE!!

J. Hud makes me want to cry. I love her dearly! (Yes, more than Oprah)


toby said...

you forgot to mention that Piven showed up with Ma! Homo Alert!