Wednesday, August 02, 2006

Biggots, Brats and Buffed Brats

Howdy Cats & Kittens,

It's summer and therefore I've been slacking on the newsfront. And of course as I lollygag in P-Town with Tobes (thanx hon!), all the major showbiz shit goes down...

Tsk, tsk, tsk

For those of you who haven't read the brilliant letter from the heads at Morgan Creek, chastising Lindsey for being an enfant terrible, it was AWESOME. They basically told her to start showing up at work on time or, not only would she be out on her keester, they'd sue for costs incurred. Yikes! Talk about a bad accident just waiting to happen. I hope I'm wrong, but it's only a matter of years before we hear about this one doing laps in a dumpster somewhere.

And now for Mel....
The Passion of the Biggoted Drunk

A classic case of In Vino Veritas. And now Mel is swiftly going out to pasture, via rehab. What an idiot. There's no faster way to get bounced out of Hollywood than dissing Jews and women. Ignorant biggoted bastid deserves what he gets.

Ashley O or Ashlee S?

OK - a nose job can change things but not this much. WTF? Ms. "proud of my bump" Ashlee Simpson has taken great pains to sand out every lump and bump that deems her human, making her one helluva hypocrite. Let's watch as she slowly emaciates until she disappears. Or even better, let's not. Ugh.

Any bets on who's getting ousted for bad behavior tonight? My money is on either Bradley for smoking reefer (he looked SO HIGH last week) or Keith for doing something arrogant and stupid to screw someone else. With all the build up, it better not be something lame like talking on a phone. Hmmmm....

I just can't get over how that blatant whore Zayra stays on. Guess getting on your knees and giving a mike head will get you far. I hate to admit it but that theatrebitch Storm Large is slowly growing on me. Let's see if she can manage to keep her clothes on for another episode.

In the end, if these folks don't hire Dilana, they have truly burnt all their brain cells.

Poor Proby. And Janet's pregnant - surprise surprise. This show is hilarious until the last few episodes, where all the sex, booze and violence blows shit right at the fan. Should be an interesting wedding for Garrity & Maggie.

Well folks, since NY is in the throes of a crazy ass heatwave, I have no celeb sightings to report, save Broadway maven Lea Delaria presiding over a pool table in P-Town.

Stay cool & have fun!


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